The Beast within Us

Mirza Ghalib wrote, “Dil Hi To Hai, Na Sangokhisht, Dard Se Bhar Na Aaye Kyon?” Ghalib felt that the human heart was full of pathos, unlike an insensitive stone brick structure.

I wonder whether Ghalib was right.

Two days ago Times Now repeatedly ran a news clip. A man was being beaten mercilessly at the Vadodara station. The man, a ticket checker, was bleeding profusely, crying for help and trying to protect himself with his bare arms. Cut to the shot of another man, who was very happily running towards the ticket checker for another assault. Cut to the shot of the ticket checker being hit on the head with a boulder, streams of blood turning his white shirt to a deep crimson. Cut to the shot of onlookers who appeared to be enjoying the agony of the hapless ticket checker.

Few years ago, I noticed a crowd of about fifty people curiously looking in a particular direction at the Kanpur railway junction. The centre of attraction was a lunatic walking on the roof of a railway bogie. The naked man was precariously close to the high tension wires that power the electric locomotives. After striding confidently for a few minutes, the man stopped and stretched his limbs. His hands touched the wire, there was a deep thud, and the man collapsed. If the man was not dead, he was surely unconscious with the near lethal dose of high voltage electric current. Worse, he had started sliding down from the curved roof. By this time some police jawans had arrived. They waited for the body to fall from a height of four metres. And it did fall eventually. The naked man soon lay sprawled between two railway tracks. The two jawans swung into action. Holding a hand each of the dying man, they made him stand, climbed over the platform, and made him walk, perhaps right up to the thana. The crowd found the spectacle of a naked man walking between two uniformed policemen funny, breaking into laughter, hooting and clapping.

I am still unable to forget the footage of an injured man being lifted through his broken arm during the Mandal agitation about twenty years ago. The man died within minutes.

Why does man treat man in such a despicable way? What makes us relish the discomfort of others? It it true that under the garb of civilisation hides a beast within us, waiting to be released at the slightest opportunity?

The ‘Interest’

It was the ‘haldi’ ceremony of Anupam. I wore a yellow dhoti and a kurta with a shawl draped over my left shoulder. Rani and I sat next to the priest. The priest was young. An MA in Sanskrit, he had resigned as lecturer in a college to don the role of a priest. His children did not like the small town where he lived during his stint as a lecturer. The low salary was another turn off, he said.

Talkative, the priest explained why certain things were performed during the puja, and also clarified the correct manner of doing them to gain desired results. A pleasant person, the priest cracked harmless jokes at appropriate moments.

An important ritual in the ceremony involved recalling dead relatives. The priest explained the process, and then said something funny. He said, “Man is more interested in his grandchildren, than in his own children. His own children are the principal amount, while the grandchildren are the interest accrued! The lender is always interested more in the interest than in the principal amount.”

The simile sounded absurd to me. I smiled, but rejected it almost instantaneously. My paternal grandfather met me only on two or three occasions, that too for very brief periods of time, and never displayed affection. He never took me around, played with me, or even talked to me beyond the one-liner, “Do you recognise me?”

My maternal grandfather saw me a little more, but he, too, was more interested in my younger cousins and my elder sister. Perhaps we never talked, though I remember touching his feet and he saying “thak, thak” every time we visited Nanaji’s place.

Daddy, that way, was better. I was aware of some correspondence between him and Anupam. Anupam met him last about eight years ago. Daddy enquired about Anupam whenever we spoke over the telephone. However, he forthrightly rejected the idea of attending Anupam’s wedding, citing his poor health! About 80 years of age, he suffers from arthritis. Walking on uneven ground causes pain to him. His knees hurt. He is content lying down on a sofa and watching television most of the time. When he stands, his back bends within seconds. He has partial vision in one eye. And, he appears to be hard of hearing. He lives thousands of kilometres away from all his children, in a house that my mother and he built together in a suburb of Patna. Mummy stayed in that house only on the ‘grihapravesha’ night. Her premature death (read blog 'Strange but True'), daddy’s premature retirement, and his movement to his own house were over in a matter of about two years. Daddy lives there away from his real children, running his mission of transforming the lives of the underprivileged. He appears to be content meeting their requirements, and has so far refused all invitations to live with us.

Rani’s father, Papa, is no more. I do not remember any exchange of affection between him and my son. Papa’s communication with Anupam revolved around securing the main gate at night, shutting down the water pump, operating the valve on the water pipe, and bringing something from the market. If the two of them ever laughed together, I missed that totally.

So, all that proclamation about grandchildren being more sought after than own children was nothing but humbug for me.

A day after the wedding we travelled to daddy’s place to seek his blessings. The train started late by about ten hours, and by the time it reached the destination it was about twelve hours behind schedule. Rather than arriving at dawn, we stood in front of the house in the evening! Daddy and the children had gathered together to welcome the new bride. A colourful ‘alpana’ greeted us at the main entrance. The children performed her ‘aarti’, gave her some sweet to eat, and entered the house behind her. The drawing room was decorated with shiny papers, flowers, and a small poster congratulating Nitasha and Anupam.

Refreshments were promptly served in brand new crockery under the supervision of Daddy. I ignored the gulab jamun, which had sugar stuck over it. The dahiwada was better. So were four or five other delicacies. I was tired, and also a little uncomfortable wondering how the city-dwelling Nitasha would appreciate such rustic fare. Daddy kept on asking whether we liked the food, and I kept nodding my head in mock approval. Frankly, there was nothing extraordinary about it. I am a little apprehensive about food bought from shops, especially if they happen to be located in backward suburbs.

Finally, one of the children broke the news. Daddy had cooked the gulab jamun, the dahiwada, and most of the other delicacies himself! Since he cannot stand for more than a few minutes, he had got the stove placed on the floor, and cooked the food for hours. It was he who had made the poster. Sheepishly, daddy added that he had also stitched new sofa covers for the occasion.

I was shocked! The entire scenario changed. The sofa cover, the decoration, the poster, the food – everything stood transformed! I saw Daddy in a new light. He did not betray any sign of suffering due to sitting for hours cooking, drawing the poster, or stitching the covers. He was happy, eager to know whether we were happy.

My eyes clouded with tears. I thought of the priest’s statement about the bond between grandparents and grandchildren, and took a gulab jamun. It was well made, so what if it had sugar stuck over it!

The Neighbourhood Restaurant

As I knocked at the door, I noticed a colourful pamphlet tucked under the door handle. The pamphlet was folded strategically to remain stuck under the handle until someone retrieved it deliberately. Well, it was the door to my house, and so I grabbed the pamphlet. Before I could start reading it, Rani opened the door. We both looked at the pamphlet with curiosity. The multi-page pamphlet on its cover bore the name and phone number of a restaurant. It promised ‘free home delivery’ of Thai, Chinese and Indian food.
Interested, we opened the pamphlet. This restaurant served over hundred variants of food! Usually some price is mentioned for each dish in such pamphlets, but this one was unique. It revealed no price!
We returned to the cover page. The restaurant appeared to be located nearby. I called up my colleague who has been staying in the area for donkey’s years. He very patiently advised me to get out of my house, turn left, and keep going straight for three kilometres to reach the place through Ramachandrapura.
Rani and I were excited. Why not visit this place during our evening walk? Determined, we came out of the house, and took left. Rani and I do not like that particular stretch of road. It does not have footpath, and the traffic is substantial. One cannot enjoy a leisurely walk on such roads.
We turned back, deciding to reach the end of the road through another route, lined with tall trees full of purple, white, and yellow flowers. Half our way through, we noticed a boulevard parallel to the road suggested by my colleague.
“Why not take this road? After all, the two roads are parallel and one can always take a cross road to reach the intended one”, said Rani. Reading the doubt in my eyes, she added, “Okay! I will ask someone to be sure”. She asked a person who appeared to be walking back home after a day at office. The person confirmed that the road indeed led to the locality intended.
“Dekkkha?”, Rani exclaimed with joy, and we started walking. Walking on that road was a pleasure. Palatial bungalows. Wide footpaths. Trees. Smell of clean air. We liked it for about twenty minutes, and then began a series of shops and residential buildings.
“Ah, look there, to your right!”, I pointed towards a decent government priced foreign liquor shop. We almost halted. “From the looks of it I can say that one can get genuine scotch and wine here”, I declared.
“Shall we walk up the stairs and check?”, asked Rani.
I was in two minds. Meanwhile, two persons started looking at us from the shop.
“Well, it would not be correct to enter the shop and enquire about a lot of things when we don’t have to buy anything now”, we agreed and resumed walking after making a mental note of the shop.
Another ten-minute stroll, and we were at a ‘T’ junction. By this time daylight had almost disappeared. We were nowhere near our destination, and didn’t even know where to find it. We had walked more than three kilometres. Luckily, most of it had been downhill.
I decided to abandon our quest and return home.
Rani checked up with another person. She was still hopeful of finding the place.
The person advised us to continue for another two kilometres and then take left to reach Ramachandrapura.
“Will you care for a samosa?”, I asked, exploiting her weakness for junk food.
“No, I am fine”.
So be it. We resumed walking.
Another ten minutes, and we saw a Maruti service station.
“We can buy the door knob here!”, we exclaimed in unison.
The broken knob lay in my pocket. It had come out in two pieces a few days ago. I had both the pieces with me. I entered the workshop, taking the broken pieces out. As I reached the door of the shop, one piece fell down and vanished somewhere. The remaining piece was sufficient for the shopkeeper to identify the desired knob and sell it to me for a princely sum of Rs.5.
We were happy. So what if we could not locate the restaurant? We had been successful in finding a decent wine shop which we would not have seen otherwise. And, we had also been able to buy the door knob, which was not available in other markets.
We walked with greater determination, and reached another ‘T’ junction. The signboards here proclaimed the name of the locality we had set out for.
“This is Block One. The restaurant is in Block Five.” Rani observed.
We took right, walking half a kilometre. Block One, like a faithful companion, continued.
“We will walk up to that red billboard and then return”, I declared.
The red billboard, too, happened to be in Block One. Perhaps Block Five was another two kilometres away.
We turned around, walking back uphill for forty five minutes, to reach home.
“I wonder how the restaurant delivers the food thus far”, I expressed my worry.
“The restaurant man does not come walking”, Rani said.
“Yes, he will not come walking”, I agreed. “And we will not walk to that place again”, I said, examining the door knob carefully.
Rani agreed. Our two-and-a-half hour long walk must have done us some good, we thought, and collapsed on the bed, exhausted.
We have not talked about that restaurant since then.