I get
flummoxed on hearing the advice, “Don’t think negatively!” Once as I was
getting ready to catch a morning non-stop Delhi-Chicago flight, my spectacles
broke in an irreparable manner. I was to be on my own in Chicago, where I would
land in the dead of the night. As I was thinking about how would I manage the
situation, pat came the advice, “Don’t think negatively!” I was surprised. What
was negative in in considering broken spectacles as broken? The next nugget of
wisdom fell, “Think positively. You may find a spectacle repair shop open even
at this early hour on your way to the airport, get it mended, and even be able
to catch your international flight.” I nodded politely. Thankfully, I had kept
a spare set with me, which came handy.
A close
relative, about eighty-five years in age, was battling with cancer. She exceeded
the doctor’s estimate by surviving for more than six months, but then her
condition started deteriorating fast. She became a skeleton wrapped in white skin.
Her face and feet swelled. She became unable to digest even the simplest of
home cooked food. She lay painfully awake in the nights. Doctors, being
consulted every day, could not offer any miraculous cure for the deadly disease.
She got wind of the situation; and asked for a puja to be performed for her
departure. She was no longer ready to accept phone calls even from her children.
This was a drastic change, as just fifteen days back when I had met her, she
was eager to meet relatives and was inquisitive about their welfare. The
writing on the wall was clear – the end was near, perhaps just a month away. Her
son tending to her day and night felt the same way. The other son, a doctor,
too felt the same way. As I was discussing her health, a positive thought was
pushed forth, “Some people who gave up survived for more than two years, so the
negative thought about her death should not be brought to mind.” Luckily her
sons did not think so ‘positively’ and moved her to a hospital.
I am finding
it difficult to think positively and assuming that she has gone to the hospital
to teach cake baking skills to the chef!
I thought
of asking:
1. Why do we send our children to the
school? So that they grow into adults who are able to live with their full potential
realised. But why this negative feeling that they will not be able to do well
if not educated?
2. Why do we take insurance cover? To
take care of the eventualities. But why think negative? After all how many
eventualities happen around us?
3. Why do we watch our weight, be
careful about what we eat, and take inoculations? Will it not be better to be
positive minded and hog whatever came our way?
Negativity
is often confused with rational thinking. The examples given above are
certainly not of negative thinking but of rational thinking. On the other hand,
negative thinking could be your feeling angry, horrible, being less productive,
finding solace in junk food and useless web-surfing all day just because
someone misbehaved with you in the morning.
It is
normal to be cautious against failures. The amygdala, the brain region that
regulates emotion and motivation, uses about two-thirds of its neurons to
detect bad news. Humans share ancestors with bats, begonias and bacteria that
go back at least 3.5 billion years. It was a matter of life and death then to
pay extra attention to dangers, react to them intensely, remember them well,
and over time become even more sensitive to them.
Only
pigeons are known to close eyes when they see a cat. We know what happens after
that. It is better to keep the eyes open and fly away to safety, so what if
that is considered as a reaction emerging out of negativity!
संदेश
